June 2009 – Rick Petry

The “Kitschen” Sink

By Rick Petry

Few people recall that CNBC–the network that recently featured a mostly balanced view of the direct response television industry titled, “As Seen On TV”–launched with an acronym that stood for “Consumer News and Business Channel.” When the network bought the carriage from Financial News Network in a distress sale after it was discovered some of FNN’s executives were allegedly cooking the books with all the subtlety of a grease fire on “Iron Chef,” a nascent DRTV ad sales executive, yours truly, was fortunate enough to make the cut. The network immediately announced that CNBC was a news network and would never run paid programming. On a scale of 1 to 10, that resolve quickly sunk as low as the first Nielsen ratings, which amounted to .01.

While CNBC acknowledged in the TV special that it has drunk freely at the trough of kitsch on display, if there was one major fault with the program, it was that it unswervingly focused on reinforcing the stereotypes of DRTV as exhibited in countless “Saturday Night Live” parodies. Since when was the Ch-Ch-Ch-Chia Pet sold anywhere besides ma-ma-ma-mass drug and retail? No mention of the best-of-breed advertisers that have employed DR over the years such as Dell, Mercedes Benz or the U.S. Navy. Not to mention the top-flight brands built with DRTV that can (and do) compete with any product in any brand arena, including Bare Escentuals, Murad and ProActiv.

As anyone who has watched ERA colleagues Billy Mays and Anthony Sullivan on Discovery Channel’s new reality show “Pitchmen” can observe first-hand, many of the industry’s leading practitioners good-humoredly embrace the sometimes over-the-top nature of their spiel. In a world where consumers are exposed to more than 6,000 advertising and marketing messages daily, it’s a tactic used to sweep aside clutter.

I was asked to procure hair-in-a-can for the then NBC network president’s birthday roast. When I made the request to the Ronco folks, the person asked, “What color?” To which I conspiratorially replied, “Oh, it doesn’t matter. It’s for a gag gift.” Following a pause so pregnant I feared we were in the third trimester, came the curt retort, “Um, I don’t think Ron would like that.” I hadn’t realized we were about the important business of restoring world order by paving over one bald spot at a time with aerosol talcum.

Perhaps it sounds like a bit of that powder has fallen to my shoulder and formed the proverbial chip. But as the direct marketing industry has evolved and expanded, the prevailing image of what direct response stands for needs to be redefined as well. Just as Las Vegas–once thought of as a tawdry den of vice populated by bargain buffet-hunting seniors–has re-imagined itself as a mecca of chic hotels, restaurants and clubs, what defines our industry in the popular imagination deserves a more glittering view. Like Sin City, the industry may exude excess, but when examined in all of its many facets, it is no less than the American Dream personified.

Rick Petry is a freelance writer who specializes in direct marketing and is a past chairman of ERA. He can be reached at (503) 740-9065, or online at rickpetry.com.