May 2009 – Column: Rick Petry

The Greatest Gift

As direct marketers, we’re in the business of persuading people to buy things, so naturally the fates would see fit to pair me with a woman who isn’t the least bit materialistic. Therefore, when our anniversary rolls around and I ask my wife what she wants–some new jewelry? an addition to her wardrobe? perhaps a Shetland pony?–the inevitable response is “no thanks.” I’ve come to realize that the present she really wants is as priceless as a MasterCard marketing punch line: my presence. This might seem simple enough, but somehow it isn’t. When you combine 150 channels of cable TV, unopened Netflix envelopes mumbling to a guilty conscience, a wireless laptop ready to ensnare me in its web and an iPhone calling with its siren song of whimsical apps all ringing, pinging and a-Twitter, you can understand that the task of getting my attention is like trying to capture a fruit fly mainlining Carmen Miranda’s hat. When pressed, even the most ambivalent consumer, including my spouse, still desires the one thing all customers want: that which is rare or exotic, which, in this case, is one man’s focus.

I’m not the first to suggest that all of this choice that was supposed to give us freedom might be enslaving us. But it’s an idea worth examining in the context of a similar paradox in the business world. For all of the technological tools at our disposal that have revolutionized our ability to conduct business, from e-mail to webinars to mobile phones, we are letting something invaluable slip away: face time. There is simply no substitute for live, person-to-person interaction to develop equity with colleagues–the proverbial deposits that 7 Habits guru Stephen Covey refers to in the context of an emotional bank account we maintain with others. It’s the stuff that allows one to tap into their network or even survive a disagreement in the form of a withdrawal.

Here’s an illustration. Who among us hasn’t fallen prey to an exchange of e-mails that turns into–forgive the vulgarity–a pissing match that can only be resolved face-to-face? The latter is what cyberpunk culture refers to as meatspace (as opposed to cyberspace) to describe the flesh-and-blood world, an ironic descriptor when it’s the technology that strips away our humanity in the form of nuance, context and that all important arbiter of communication: body language.

These are distinctions worth highlighting amid the economic mess we are currently mired in because the temptation to rely on the phone call or the online demonstration versus the personal meeting is so great. But we’ve been here before. Recall the post-911 United Airlines campaign, “It’s time to fly again”? Look, I understand that we all have to be discerning with our dollars these days. But this is an argument for quality, not quantity.

Not the nod across the room to a longtime associate who gets lost in the shuffle of good intentions where the time to catch up later is never realized, but rather real, genuine engagement. Yes, it’s the very same thing I’ll bet your wife–or husband, child or even dog–is craving: you. Unplugged. Undistracted.

No ribbon required.

Rick Petry is a freelance writer who specializes in direct marketing and is a past chairman of ERA. He can be reached at (503) 740-9065, or online at rickpetry.com.